Friday, February 10, 2017

ADVICE for THOSE WHO WANT #love #friends #sex

 So my advice for those of you who are really truly looking for love is going to make some of you unhappy--oh hell it's going to make all of you unhappy--but wait on sex. Why would any adult in the year 2017 wait on anything, let alone sex? Simply put the physical act of sexual intercourse can create a metaphysical reaction that opens a star-gate of potential  alternatives in our lives. No idiot, I'm not talking about just sex with strangers or established friends. I'm talking about sex with someone you could in fact, if the moon and Jupiter align, find love with.

 He's no wizard he's a puritan.

Look, sex is not love and love is not sex, but  good sex can feel like love and even worse great sex can breed obsession which is a cousin to love but a distant cousin believe me. Everyone chuckles to themselves that sex is no big deal, it's a physical act. I'll argue this. A. You aren't doing it right. B. You haven't done it right yet. C. Someday when you do it right you'll see I was right all along.

'But I've had great sex with strangers.' Of course you have, you had no consequences or emotion it was a purely physical act. But my advice is not for anyone practicing commitment free sexual activity, swipe left hook ups or orgies or whatever. I'm trying to advise those actually searching for a lover. Lover in the truest sense of caring and sharing love, both physically and emotionally together.

Here is the thing. You've got feelings for someone and you want to explore them more deeply. Sex is sure to follow. But what if the sex is BAD? Are you guys done? Actually usually bad sex leads to break ups. It's like eating cake filled with mold. Sex is the treat couples look forward to, and if that is rotten what else do they have?

So here is why you wait a while. Friendship. Friendship can create a second or third or even fourth chance for bad sex to be corrected. If you know the person your dating was awesome before you became sexual you know they are still awesome. Maybe the sex can improve. Not maybe, all sex can improve with trust and communication. Now let's hope the sex is good and then another piece of the relationship puzzle snaps into place.