People make too big a God Damn deal about recruiting. College football fans have just experienced the NIGHT CLUB effect of the fanning process. National signing day #signingday, which was a few days ago, always reminds me of evenings out chasing female companionship. The days leading up to the night chatter among myself and my chums was as optimistic and lusty a Penthouse forum. Dreams of 5 star babes stepping off a bachelorette party bus dressed in their hottest ‘God why can’t it be me’ outfits streaming into the club – empty except for you and your friends (of course) – seemed not only possible but a forgone expectation of the night. #dreamon
Then the night begins. The female friend from work who was bringing her cousins, who’d just graduated from university (from a sorority of course), cancels first. You do have the club to yourself, but that’s just because you arrived no less than 2 hours early. There are some girls there. Some of the girls there are attractive; they are 3 star early evening girls who make the night sufficiently bearable. But of course the 4 star girls have to make a big show of their commitment to the club, after all they could have gone to 8 or 9 different clubs so why would they just walk into the one you chose, adore, and support with all your heart and soul? But they do come, and the night takes on a euphoric aura of invincibility. No wonder why you love this club EVERYONE loves it and is arriving to make it a better place transforming your beloved club into a mega club through their dedication and hard work. But, and this is where the night gets foggy, then some 5 star mega beauty, an angelic creature of mythical caliber that eclipses all the other girls already committed to the club, places her hand upon the door of our chosen club, but then moves along to another location all together. ‘Disloyal bitch,’ you mutter. ‘We didn’t want them in our club anyway,’ your idiot friend barks trying to once again view the 4 star girls as goddesses, despite the fact they couldn’t poor the wine for the true magnificent deity that elected not to come in.
Think I’m going over board? Ask any university football fan about signing day and I’m willing to wager the first thing they will say is it was good and then they’ll follow that up with BUT there were some 5 stars that slipped away that would have really made it SPECIAL.
People make too big a God Damn deal about recruiting.